DETROIT, MICHIGAN. August 31st 2016. At a press conference in Detroit, Michigan, FrameFlow’s president and CEO announced plans to move into a new technology market. Said Mr. Leclair, “Today my friends, we are delighted to announce that we are launching a fleet of self-driving cars. We’re going to take on Uber. We are going take on Lyft. We are going to take on Google and we are going to win.”
When asked how a company like FrameFlow, with relatively modest resources, could compete with the current industry heavyweights, FrameFlow officials described how they had discovered various economies enabling them to deploy their fleet with cost savings that the competition could not meet. Said one FrameFlow official, “We saved a bundle on the vehicles themselves and we think you’re going to love the retro look.”
Base rates for point-to-point transfers are 20% less than Uber pricing. Industry analysts lauded the reduced rates and agreed that if they can be maintained FrameFlow will represent a significant threat to Uber and could cause Google to abandon its own nascent effort. At the same time they cautioned that extra fees and add-ons could take the shine off of FrameFlow’s offering.
FrameFlow’s suite of add-ons includes:
Generic breath mints for $2.50 each or Orange TicTacs for $3 each
Be there in 180 minutes or it’s free, $25
Option to ride shotgun for $99.95 per trip
Option to activate passenger airbags, $49.95 per trip
Seat belts priced affordably at $14.95 per passenger
FrameFlow’s proposal is pending approval by the U.S. Department of Transportation but company officials expressed optimism that they would quickly receive regulatory approval. Said Mr. Leclair, “We met with DoT officials last week in their main boardroom. They seemed a bit skeptical of our plans and sadly they declined our request to stay in the boardroom for the night. But as the security officers ushered us out I quietly left twenty bucks on the table so I think we’re good. Elon Musk told me he did the same thing and it worked for him.”
Facing skepticism about the age and quality of their initial fleet of vehicles, FrameFlow officials assured analysts that a new vehicle design was in the works and even provided blueprints.
FrameFlow’s shares closed up 16 points bringing it to a new 52-week high and was one of the ten top movers on the Cambodian stock exchange.
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